Damn Fool

For this assignment the prof pulled a random line from my previous poem(Morgan's Bitch) and had me write a new poem using that line. The line he chose was "You tear my life with word". I decided that I'd go with a sort of ironic facetious emo theme. I actually used my roommate as partial inspiration for the toasted bagel part. We have an ongoing debate over whether bagels should be toasted before consumption. This is a tribute to that debate! I actually liked the finished product, I hope you enjoy it as well!

Damn Fool

The thin toaster cord pulls from the outlet
Leaving me, standing naked, in the bath
A fool with a black cord around his neck
A damn fool with toast crumbs pooling around his feet
One subconscious glance to the mirror and a smirk
I say out loud, “You tear my life with word”
Torn like the pages from the water-damaged suicide manual
Wet from the car plunge I took into the frozen river

I’m not sure if I ever tried to like myself
There is some love lost between me and my esteem
One more failed attempt, another fuck-up to frame
One, two, three, four, seven, eight, ten, damn
I cannot count under this heavy pressure
How many pills did I just swallow?
How many fucking…who am I asking?
The mirror isn’t responding you psycho

This would be a lot easier if I wasn’t afraid of guns
The cold metal, the noise, that social stigma
You know the one where guys use guns
I’m a guy alright but I’m an emotional pussy
That’s why I sit here, naked and freezing
My hands trembling as I try to count pills
The pills that my therapist gave me to help
I know, the irony, isn’t it delicious?

My roommate will be off of work soon
She usually makes a toasted bagel for a snack
If I don’t finish this soon she’ll notice the toaster
If she notices that then I’m sure the bitch will notice me
Naked and scared out of my fucking mind on the bathroom floor
That cord snaking from my neck to the bathtub and the pile of white pills
I’m laughing again; I can see it in the same mirror
It’s either the irony or that I can’t even make myself disappear